Dressing Up, Not Over

We live in a casual world.  For better or for worse, we do.  So sauntering to class in a suit and swapping that suit out for a dinner jacket come evening is not something I get to do very often.  The Romantic part of me wishes it were so, but it’s more important to understand there’s a difference between being dressed up and being over dressed.

For those of us who love tailored clothing, it’s sometimes a pain to field the “Oh, do you have something special today?” and “What are you so dressed up for?” we get from time to time.  Occupational hazard I guess.  But whether we like it or not, most guys spend very little of their lives in suits (and even sport coats for that matter).  I’m not suggesting we stop wearing and loving them.  Just that we have to do it with some grace.

There’s nothing elegant or gracious about looking like a snot.  In my case as a humanities graduate student, showing up to class in a suit or to drinks in a DJ would result in a mixture of snickers and snubbing.  Sure, I might feel like I look like a million bucks, but I’d be left feeling that way all by myself.  You’re clothes shouldn’t make you feel comfortable at anyone else’s expense.

But I do like “dressing up.”  If I’m getting dinner for a special occasion or heading to a bar nicer than my usual dive, a dark velvet jacket and crisp white shirt might get a night out.  Meeting with important faculty?  I’ll use it as an excuse to toss on a silk tie instead of a more casual wool or knit option.

I do like my clothes though, and I’m not ashamed to admit it.  Sportcoats get regular rotation, as do flannel and corduroy trousers this time of year.  Ties are usually kept semi-casual, and I try not to mix too many formal elements at once.  Looking like an extra in a Masterpiece Mystery isn’t my goal, nor is inspiring ire from those in perfectly-reasonable denim and knit ensembles.

That brings us to over-dressing.  Dressing can be self-indulgent, but it’s no cause for self-importance.  If you think putting on a tie in a room full of open-neckers makes you superior, you need a serious reality check.  Sociability and respect are part of dressing properly, and there’s respectful about alienating others through a swatch of wool or silk.

What we Americans call “Costume,” our friends across the pond call “Fancy Dress,” and I think they’re on to something here.  If you throw on your garb for the day and when you look in the mirror the word “Fancy” comes to mind at all, go change.  I promise you won’t regret it.

Think about the best dressed gents in the last 100 years.  The Duke of Windsor wore very casual (for his time) lounge suits and sport coats.  Agnelli knew when a suit was and was not appropriate.  And you didn’t see Astaire lounging around in a top hat.

Dressing up is fine, over-dressing just makes you a jerk.